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As a mentor with Friends of the Children, I look after eight boys. Each of them is just like any other kid; they want to be loved, they like to have fun, they crave attention. The difference with my boys is that they aren’t getting what they need at home.
Brian* and I started working together this year. He lives with his mother in public housing in a neighborhood losing the battle against drugs and gangs. At any given moment, eight to 10 people might be crammed into their three-bedroom apartment. Brian’s guardians are his mother, aunt, and grandmother. The only male influences he has are his two older cousins who are in middle and high school, the ever-present drug dealers in the neighborhood, and me.
During my time with Brian we’ve dealt with problems ranging from truancy, fighting in school, and disrespectful behavior towards his teacher and me.
But there are great things about Brian, too. This seven-year-old is very smart, athletic, and a social butterfly. He’s tough and strong-minded, waking himself up in the morning and dressing himself for school. His clothes are often worn and ill fitting, certainly not like what the other kids are wearing. He actually looks in the Lost and Found at school for clothes his size so he can dress like everyone else. If I can help channel that creativity and initiative, I know Brian will make amazing progress.
I see Brian twice a week, every week. I sit with him in class and work with him on homework after school. We go to the park, the movies, and play games. I see Brian trying to be a regular kid, but I also feel the influences of his neighborhood, his financial circumstances, and the impact of growing up without a father. We are beginning to channel that creativity and I can already see that Brian’s ambitions for the future are very promising.
* Names have been changed to protect our children. The stories do not correlate with the child pictured.